Yesterday my therapist was trying to make the point that it is acceptable to "not like" some people. While it is true that there are some people I do not like, I struggle feeling okay about that. So I kind of tend to be in denial.
She brought up food. "Think of a food you don't like," she suggested. My mind went blank. Suddenly I had an aha! moment and giggled. I explained that it was probably difficult to think of anything off the top of my head, because several years ago I'd decided that I should be able to like all foods if I tried hard enough.
That approach has been useful to me. I've discovered that I enjoy a much greater variety than I'd originally thought. But at the end of the day I must admit...I still don't like everything. I don't like oyster omelettes, or pigs blood rice, or animal skin/fat/gristle. Blech.
And furthermore...as yucky as it feels...I don't like some people. Particularly those that (in the words of my therapist) "sh*t on me for the third or fourth time."
While I value and will try my best to utilize an accepting approach - I'd like to try to like all people (and foods!) - I also have to be fair to myself. Part of what makes me me is my own set of preferences and expectations.
This kind of reminds me of our conversation about allowing for cultural relativism while maintaining some ethical standards. I can treat others with empathy and respect, but I should not confuse those feelings with unconditional love, and I should also seek to be honest (with myself) about my aversions.
Can anyone else relate to this?